The angel from my nightmare
by ncisgirl101
Summary: Tony and Ziva are standing at the altar about to be married when their is an objection by the one person no one was expecting to object. A bit emotional. The only thing to expect is the unexpected. A little Out of character... Now complete. :D:D
1. Any objections?

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_Hey everyone! I'm back it seems… well anyway, I don't want to keep you too long, I just want you to know that this particular chapter is INCREDIBLY short.. sorry about that… I promise the rest will be longer but you'll soon see why the first is so short.. Thankyou, please don't expect it to be like this for the rest because the next chapters should be over 1000 words just not this one at the moment.. anyway, Thankyou! AND PLEASE ENJOY!! _

_Xox Mel _

_ - _

**Chapter 1- any objections? **

Tony looked down at his lapel, a simple white flower sat his breast pocket, like everything planned for the day it was simple but truly beautiful. He felt his forehead sweat up and his stomach rise into his throat. He felt a pat on his back. He turned around, looking out of the corner of his eye; Gibbs' hand moved back and forth on Tony's shoulder in comfort, reminding him of why he was doing this. Their eyes met for a split second, Tony's thankful, Gibbs' proud.

As the music began the large crowd stood up in unison, congregated in fields of NCIS and Mossad agents; of course accompanied by proud relatives occupying the front rows. Tony looked up, as two small girls walked down the grass isle, dropping pink rose petals on the ground as they drew closer. The two girls were followed by the pageboy, holding a small simple settling place for the two rings.

Next around the corner came the bridesmaids, led by some of Tony's old friends from Baltimore P.D, the bridesmaids were also simple, wearing soft blue dresses, the blue so fine it seemed as though one shade lighter would be white.

Tony sharply inhaled; 'here it comes.' He thought to himself.

Around from behind the tree surrounding the outdoor wedding set-up came Ziva in a beautiful white dress. Members of the crowd gasped in awe, followed by whispers, Tony exhaled slowly. She looked beautiful. Her hair curly; coming down the one side of her neck, draping over her shoulder. Her dress was straightforward yet absolutely breathtaking. Tony smiled at his bride with not a care in the world, as though they were the only two that existed. As she drew closer the whispers stopped and a few tears fell from members of the audience.

Ziva had a look of humility on her face; she smiled at Tony and then faced the parishioner, ready to begin.

-

As the service went on, Tony had just completed his vows, not taking his eyes off Ziva throughout.

"Very nice vows, Anthony" Complimented the parishioner, smiling.

Ziva smiled at him too, her eyes staring at him lovingly

"If anyone objects to these two being joined in holy patrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace."

Tony glanced at his soon-to-be bride, slightly nervous that her father would object, after all, he wasn't Jewish. Ziva smiled at him, filling him with confidence.

A long silence went by and for that they were both grateful.

"Okay, well without further a due—"

"I object." Came a female voice from one of the back rows. Ziva's stomach filled with butterflies. Tony stood up tall, a confused look on his face.

The female figure stood up. Tony's mouth opened, shocked, as though his mind was so boggled by the experience that it couldn't comprehend; standing at the back row, next to his old boss from Baltimore was ex NCIS Agent Caitlin Todd.

-

_Okay, so that was the first chapter… I promise you with all my heart the next chapters will be longer!!_

_THANKYOU FOR READING! _

_Xox Mel _


	2. The burden of my past

_**HELLO!! THANKYOU ALL FOR YOUR WONDERFUL REVIEWS.. You are all angels.**_

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**Chapter 2 – This is the burden of my past. **

Tony moved closer to his old partner, the partner that died right next to him, her blood on his face as she lay still, forever to stay that way.

He walked off the podium he was at and stormed out of the wedding area toward his preparation tent, he rubbed his brow, refusing to look back to Ziva or Kate.

Tony sat down at his dressing table, staring into his own reflection, shaken by the events that had just taken place. The start of the day seemed full of a positive, optimistic outlook.

"Tony?" Kate entered his tent tentatively, careful not to shake his nerves more than they had already been shaken.

"What do you want me to say Kate?" he asked, not turning around or daring to look her in the eye.

"I'm sorry, Tony." She said, looking down to her feet. "I should have told you."

He stood up and turned around, looking her dead in the eye, past everything else, as though his eyes bored into her very soul. "No, Kate. You died. I was there, I saw you. We got Ari back."

A tear slipped down her face, she broke off from Tony's strong hold his eyes had on hers. "I'm sorry, Tony. I wanted to tell you, and Gibbs and McGee but I couldn't, Ari was going to get me."

Tony's eyes thinned out, his sadness turning to hurt. "How did we not know? What about the blood? I felt it against my..." He touched his hand to his face, his eyes filling with water. "Against my face."

"He hit my ear. I was lucky, we weren't planning for Ari to make an appearance, but I knew I had to pretend to be dead so he would stay off you and Gibbs and the team." Kate moved her eyes back to Tony's "Ducky and Abby knew."

He'd loved Kate and she had kept this from him. All the feelings he ever felt for her were gone and now she seemed a stranger, replaced by Ziva whom he had a much greater regard for, there was something missing that would never be back about Caitlin Todd.

"Why are you here Kate?" asked Tony, composing himself to remain in a state of anger, trying hard for the feelings he once felt to arise again.

"I had to give it a chance." She answered, looking down, as if what she said shamed her.

"Give what a chance?" he asked

"Us." She began "I wanted you to know I was alive before you married _her_." She composed herself.

"Us? Kate. There is no 'us' you had your chance ages ago. That ship is sailed. You think just cause you 'died' I have to go for second best?" Tony was angry with her; he didn't understand what she was doing.

"No, Tony I'm not saying that at all." Kate started again, what she had said taken completely out of context.

"Well what are you saying then, _Miss_ Todd" Tony purposely reminded her she wasn't an agent anymore. A lump rose in her throat, this hit her hard. She never thought Tony could get this angry with one person. She swallowed the lump pressing against her neck.

"I'm saying that _I _didn't want you marrying her." She practically spelled it out for him

Tony's face relaxed in a way that he now understood what was going on, this face, however did not remain. "I love Ziva." He stated "and now you want me to love you. Well it's not going to happen, Kate. It took me too long to get over you and I'm not going back there." With that, Tony turned his back on her, exiting his preparation tent leaving her behind crying.

-

Tony quietly entered Ziva's tent, careful not to push her too far. He slowly walked toward her, her back turned on him. He stopped about a meter away from her.

"That was Kate, wasn't it?" Ziva asked; her back still turned on her fiancé.

Tony looked down, an ashamed expression on his face. "Yes" He answered her in a tone just above a whisper.

"Why?" She asked, her voice hurt. She turned around to face Tony, her eyes bloodshot and her face stained with mascara streaks.

Tony did not answer her. His eyes met hers and then returned to the fixated position on the floor. He moved closer to her and outstretched his arms. Ziva sobbed and fell into him. He held her close, one of his arms caressing the back of her neck, the other the small of her back.

"I'm sorry," He whispered into her ear.

-

Kate sat at Tony's dressing table, studying her face. Although she was still the same person she didn't seem it. When she was an NCIS she held herself high, like a proud parent. But now she had changed. Her hair was layered and her back slouched. The transition between NCIS special agent and Witness Relocation had been a rough one but it had happened so long ago she didn't realise how much she had changed.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps; Kate turned around and stood up.

"Hello, Gibbs" She said, butterflies arising in her stomach

Gibbs' face-hardened slightly, as if he was building a wall up around himself. "Kate" He finally acknowledged.

"I'm sorry Gibbs" she began before her former boss could say a word. "He was going to get me."

This hit Gibbs hard. He had always prided himself on being able to take care of his team but when Kate died he felt as though he had let her down, much like he had let Shannon and Kelly down.

"I would have protected you, Kate. I protected all the others. Why did you run off?"

Kate stared at the ground "Is Ari dead?" she was ashamed to ask.

His back stiffened, Gibbs hadn't heard that name in a long time. The name always reminded him of Kate lying still, lifeless.

"Yes." He finally said, "Do you think that low of me?"

"What?"

"Do you think that low of me that I wouldn't have killed that bastard after he…" Gibbs' voice trailed off, Kate's eyes rose to meet his, her eyes telling him to continue.

"After he what?" she finally pushed him.

"After he killed you." He said, leaving the tent. Once again leaving Kate to feel as though she was the only solitary being on the planet.

-

Tony and Ziva still held each other in comfort; they broke off from their long embrace and Ziva looked up at her love.

"She's in love with you, isn't she?" Ziva finally asked, her tears finally settling in her eyes.

Tony's eyes drifted down and in a blink they were staring back into hers. "Yes."

"Did you love her?" she asked

He looked at his feet, closing his eyes to stop any tear escaping. "Yes." He answered quietly.

Ziva's eyes swelled up again, "Do you still love her?"

Tony thought about the question for a while, after a long silence he moved his head up and met his eyes with hers. "I don't know." He answered.

Ziva moved closer to Tony, and held his hand.

"Until you find out." She chocked, turning her back on him, exiting the tent.

Tony opened his hand. A simple gold engagement ring sat in the middle of his palm.

-

_Thankyou for reading this chapter... Was I serious or was I serious… I trust this is long enough: D:D I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and hold on for more:D:D anyway, all suggestions, ect are VERY welcome and any criticism is always welcome as well (as long as it's constructive :D:D ) anything to help my writing is much appreciated! _


	3. The night of

_**H**__ey everyone!! Thankyou for all your wonderful reviews... When we left off I think Ziva had just left Tony se anyway... Without further a due, I give you chapter 3!__Also, sorry that the update took so long… The internet has been a little odd… :D:D_

_But thankyou for sitting tight._

_Xox Mel_

_**-**_

_**Chapter 3 – The night of**_

Tony sat at the end of the bar, a bourbon-coke in his hand. That would be his third for the night. Tony never drank bourbon-coke but tonight beer just couldn't cut it. He got up and stumbled over to a familiar character.

"Hello Kate." He said to the now blurry figure. "What tare you doing here?" He slurred drunkenly.

"Hi Tony." She tried to smile back at him; she was just as drunk and depressed as him. "I was here and I was drinking" she laughed.

"Yeah, well I was here and I saw you and I thought that you were the one who ruined my wedding day and my wedding night." He pointed at her crookedly, his face fell and his eyes drooped. Tony never usually got this upset and vulnerable. It took a lot for him to admit he was sad.

Kate sat down on the stool in front of her; just sitting seemed to sober her up even more. "Yeah, Tony I'm really sorry about that. I'm not usually this spontaneous and stupid but I just wanted you to know that I cared for you."

"Yeah" Tony said quietly, taking a seat next to her. "Ziva left me, you know?" he then piped up.

She looked into his eyes again; they were bloodshot and red. "Yeah, I'm sorry."

"Until you find out," he repeated the words Ziva had said to him that afternoon, placing her gold engagement ring into his hand.

"What?" Kate asked; she now seemed totally sobered up.

"Do you know why she left me?" Tony asked, not slurring as much. "Because she thinks I love someone else." He rubbed his brow.

"Do you?" she asked.

"I don't know." He repeated those immortal lines he had said before to Ziva "I- I didn't think I did."

Kate leaned forward to Tony "who is the other girl?" She asked, nearly falling off her chair as she over balanced herself.

He looked up into her eyes "Like you don't know" he spat out at her.

She stared into his eyes, looking into his soul "I'm sorry" she said from the bottom of her heart.

Tony shrugged off her apology and got up from the bar.

"Where are you going?" she asked

"Home" he yelled back at her.

Kate jumped up from the bar and ran crookedly over to him. "You can't" she began, "I'll call you a taxi and I will take care of you." She said without thinking of the consequences.

Tony lost his balanced and fell into Kate's arms, she managed to hold him up as he laughed. "Sorry Katie" he slurred, lifting his head up to invade her personal space.

The two stared into each other's eyes; Kate moved her face closer to his, closing the gap between them. She held Tony up as their lips met, Kate realised Tony was drunk but she figured it was over between him and Ziva. Although this wasn't the way she wanted this you happen she pushed down against him, deepening the kiss.

-

McGee sat Ziva down on her couch, although the tears had stopped, she was still trembling slightly.

"Are you going to be okay?" asked McGee in his concerned tone. He was always so kind and caring.

Ziva nodded slightly. McGee took this as a 'no' and went to the kitchen to retrieve a glass of water for her.

"You can go now, Timothy" she forced a smile, hoping it would convince him to leave.

McGee handed her the water and frowned, the way he did when he was contemplating something with his mouth slightly scrunched up and to the side.

"Alright" he finally concluded. "Are you sure you'll be okay?"

"Fine" Ziva forced her most convincing smile.

McGee nodded and left Ziva alone. He closed the door behind him and began walking down the hall. After walking about 5 steps he bumped into Tony.

"Oh, Hi DiNozzo" He said, stumbling on his words "I don't think seeing her is such a good idea"

Tony kept walking past McGee, as if he didn't hear a word said. All his mind was focused on was Ziva.

Inside, Ziva sat staring at a picture, a tear slipped down her face and landed on the frame. She moved the picture in closer to her heart, as though she was hugging it.

"I'm Sorry, Ari," she whispered.

Once she calmed herself down, Ziva grabbed her keys and headed for the front door, she felt so stupid. If she hadn't have said anything maybe her and Tony would be married by now.

She shrugged off all her thoughts and headed for her car.

-

**In Tony's Apartment**:

Ziva walked to his front door, still tossing up whether to knock or use her key to enter. She pressed her head against his door, unsure if this was a good idea. Laughter came from the inside of his apartment… playful Laughter.

Ziva's eyes thinned out. She decided to knock and see how he would talk his way out of this. Inside she knew staying was a bad idea but she couldn't tear herself away.

She knocked on the door hard. 1 minute later Tony appeared, fully clothed and sobered.

"Hey Ziva." He said, stepping into the hall, closing the door behind him to give them some privacy.

Ziva had a look of shock and despair on her face, "who was that?" she asked without looking at her former partner [_partner in the relation ship sense_

Tony looked behind him in a reflex. He contemplated lying to her but he knew it would do no good.

He sighed "Kate"

Tears formed in her eyes, she looked him in his eyes and backed away, her entire body lost its strength and she dropped the photo she was holding. She backed faster and turned away,

"Ziva wait" he called after her. Tony looked at the picture on the ground; it was of a teenage Ziva with a boy. They looked happy, their arms around each other. As Tony stared at the picture he realised whom the other person was.

"Ziva Wait!" He called again, chasing after her

He caught up to her and she spun around, tears rolling down her face, causing her to shake uncontrollably, though she had no control over her own body.

"What is this?" he asked, angry "Why are you with Ari?"

Ziva gasped for air in her hysterical state "My brother"

"What? You knew he was going to kill Kate and you did nothing?" he yelled more than asked.

"I killed." She sobbed, "I killed him"

-

_Okay, hope we all liked that little piece of crumpet, not over yet.. What will happen to Ziva? What will Tony do when he realises what happened?? Your just going to have to read to find out :P:P_

_Xox Mel_


	4. when the rain won't stop falling

Well we are back again… Thankyou all SO SO SO much for all your wonderful reviews and the support when the computer was down. It means the world to me that you all have been following and commenting and if I had the money I would buy you all Aston Martins! Thankyou thankyou thankyou to the 9th moon of Jupiter and back! Thankyou all so much! (Jupiter has 9 moons, right? I haven't done astronomy since grade 4).

Xox Mel

**Chapter 4- **

Tony stared into Ziva's eyes, he knew she had killed many before but something about her eyes told him she was carrying a terrible burden.

"Killed who?" he asked intently

Ziva was quiet; she avoided eye contact and fixed her eyes to a spot on the floor.

"Ari" she finally answered, her voice lower then a whisper.

And then it hit him; his face fell into shock. Everything made sense. Why Gibbs was so accepting of her, everything. Tony tried to gather his scrambled thoughts.

"Why?" he finally whispered. He knew it was a stupid thing to ask – And would probably not make her feel any better - but something made him human enough to blurt out the question.

Ziva's eyes swelled with tears, her eyes slipped up slowly until they met his "He killed Kate. He was going to kill Gibbs." She explained, still shaking from the inbuilt hysteria she had been holding onto ever since her half brother's death.

"You – You saved him?" Tony's eyes widened again. How had he been so stupid? How could he had not realised what was going on. Ziva had been holding onto this terrible burden for so long and he never even realised.

"Oh Ziva, I am so sorry." He moved toward her, his arms out stretched to hold her tightly.

Ziva didn't react. She didn't move forward or backward. She just allowed his arms to wrap around her, encasing her in an aura of calm. When she was with Tony, it was as though there was no one else. When he wrapped his arms around her it was like everything was going to be okay; like they didn't need food, water or even oxygen, like they only needed each other and that they could stay in each other's arms for the rest of eternity.

"Tony?" A some-what familiar voice called from his apartment door.

Ziva stiffened at the sound of _her_ voice and pushed Tony away. It was like someone had shaken her back to reality. Kate's voice brought her back to planet earth.

"Ziva" He called, trying to comfort her. No, calm her.

"No" The tears swelled again. "Forget about it, Tony."

She backed a few steps and then turned to walk away. Leaving Tony standing solitary; fighting for the proper articulation. He wanted to yell after her, trying to make it better but he couldn't. Like someone had ripped out his voice box, his mouth was moving but there was no sound.

"What's going on, Tony?" Kate asked loud enough for Ziva to hear. And for her, that was the last straw.

Ziva spun around mid-stride and moved a few steps closer.

"Like you don't know!" she spat hysterically at Kate.

Tony was caught between the two, still fighting for proper articulation.

Kate was silent; she turned to Tony. "Oh, you told her about the kiss" She said quietly to him.

"What?" Ziva coughed, her body stiffening.

Tony shot a look at Kate.

There was a calm silence, almost too calm like the eye of the storm.

"Oh god." Was all Ziva could say. She turned and walked away, ignoring the calls coming from behind her.

"I'm sorry, Tony." Kate walked to his side to comfort him.

Tony didn't respond, he just stood and stared down the hall long after Ziva had disappeared behind the corner.

Ziva walked into work the next day, she moved past the usual bullpen and straight to the director's office. McGee stood and began to walk over to her but she just waved him down.

"Hello Ziva" Jen said on Ziva's entry, the tone of her voice indicated she was half expecting her to enter. "Here are your papers, you can go back to Mossad whenever you're ready." She handed over the papers with an indifferent façade but behind her eyes it was killing her to loose not only one of the best agents but also one of her friends.

Ziva leaned forward and took the papers with the same indifferent concealment, it was killing her to leave as much as anyone else. She fought back the tears, vowing to keep the promise she hade to herself to never shed another tear over Anthony DiNozzo.

"I'm sorry it had to end this way." Jen added, the expression in her eyes taking over her whole face.

Ziva nodded and moved closer to her "I'm going to miss you, Jen." She hugged her director and smiled weakly.

"Where's Gibbs? Does he know?" she asked, wiping a tear from her eye.

"I kind of figured." Gibbs said, entering the office. "Plus my signature is on the papers."

Ziva smiled weakly. And moved to hug her boss.

"You're a hell of an agent, David." He noted seriously. Hugging her like he would hug his own daughter. As much as it hurt him to say goodbye, he knew it was best for her. So much for keeping this professional and businesslike. Gibbs had said goodbye to a lot of good agents but none like this, never like this; His team was the best out there.

Ziva sobbed. Did they know everything? How could they know what he did with Kate?

"Thankyou." She said. Exiting the office.

Next were Abby, Palmer, McGee and Ducky. Ziva walked into the bullpen and McGee shot up again. This time all the people she needed to say goodbye to were in the bullpen.

She smiled dimly at all of them.

"I'm going to miss you all" she said when she arrived at her desk. McGee sighed and moved closer to Ziva to hug her. The other three surrounded her, waiting for their hugs and goodbyes. Abby began to cry; she had begun to like Ziva over time.

Gibbs and Jen watched from the sides, all of them fitting into the small bullpen.

Ziva dabbed at her tears again and moved to the elevator, pressing the button. She turned to face the six pairs of eyes watching her.

"Thankyou. I am going to miss you all." The elevator doors opened then, the only thing left to do was leave now. She walked into the elevator and turned to face the six people who were more family to her then her own. Abby, always so bubbly and bright, McGee; so loyal and kind, Gibbs; her more like a father figure then that of her own, Jen; proud and intelligent, Ducky; So kind and Wise and Jimmy; so quiet yet so sweet.

Ziva studied each of their faces for the final time and let the elevator doors close on her, leaving the team one short in every possible way.

_Thankyou for reading I hope that was worth the wait, It does get better I promise but now all that's left is for Tony to choose… Ziva or Kate… since season 3 THAT has been the question on every NCIS fan's lips… Thankyou so much! I will update ASAP!!!_

_Thankyou!_

_Xox Mel_


	5. the decision

_Hello everybody! I'm not sure if you realised but I replaced chapter 4 'not a chapter' with an actual chapter, so if you don't understand what's going – that would be why. Anyway, without further stalling for time, I give you: _

Chapter 5: The decision.

Tony woke up, his mind groggy and clouded from the night before. So many things came crashing down on him, Ziva at the altar, the look of disgust and sadness not quite masked to the full extent. It was like his life was flashing before his eyes and in some ways it was, his life with Ziva was over and he was not ready for that. He was not ready to say goodbye to Ziva, not yet.

Then it hit him.

He couldn't live without Ziva. He couldn't let go of her, not now, not so soon. he could easily live a happy life with Kate but as much as he liked her that future looked so bleak, almost non-existent, like it wasn't even a possibility.

Tony jumped out of his bed and hurriedly got dressed.

"I have to go." He said quickly to Kate as he entered his kitchen to her pouring herself a cup of coffee.

"What?" Kate asked, confused.

"I have to talk to someone." He said; this was going to be the hard part. He stood still and stared directly into Kate's eyes. '_Nothing_' he thought to himself, internally smiling. "I'm sorry Kate but I can't live without her. It's like for the first time in my life I know what I want. I never knew there was anything missing but it's like all of a sudden I feel complete, like there's a path I want to follow and if Ziva's not there with me then it's not worth it. I'm sorry."

Surprisingly Kate wasn't angry or upset. "I'm glad you've found someone Tony. And I'm glad you know what you want. I just didn't want to go down without trying." she smiled warmly, the way she used to occasionally when she truly and sincerely felt something. "Good luck."

With that Tony ran to her side, pecked her on the cheek and ran out the door.

Tony walked up to Ziva's door. His mind was made up. It wasn't even a decision. All he wanted was to be with her, to wake up to her every morning for the rest of his life.

He knocked on the door quickly with a little too much enthusiasm.

"Ziva!" he called "Ziva please open up, I love you!"

Eventually he gave up on knocking and used his own key to unlock her door. He walked inside and his body stiffened. It was empty. It still had a few things around but it was empty.

The sudden realisation that he could be too late hit him and before he could spare a second to think, he was sprinting back to his car on his way to work.

"Where is she?" He demanded as he barged into the director's office.

Gibbs and Jen both looked up at the same time, Jen was slightly shocked.

"She didn't tell you?" She asked

"Well otherwise I wouldn't be here."

"She's on her way back to Tel Aviv." She informed him reluctantly, unsure of whether or not she should have disclosed that information, and one quick glance at Gibbs didn't indicate she'd done the wrong thing.

"What?" Tony was dumbstruck "When?"

"She's scheduled to leave at 3" Gibbs piped up, not as reluctant as his former partner to inform Tony of where she was.

"That gives me an hour. Thanks" Tony turned and ran to his car determined to reach the airport before Ziva left

"_3 o'clock flight to Tel Aviv boarding in 15 minutes_"

Ziva glanced up at the speakers like they were calling her to the gallows. Like her life was coming to an end. In some ways it was, she was ending her time in Washington to move back to Mossad and act as though these years at NCIS never happened.

Tony drove into the airport at twice the legal limit, swerving and avoid angry yells and car horns from other drivers. Finally he reached the taxi drop off and illegally parked his car.

"5 minutes" he said to himself, running before his tires had fully stopped.

Tony ran into the airport, nearly taking out a whole family at the speed he was going.

He glanced up at the board to check the gates. Gate 5. He sighed, slightly relieved; gate 5 wasn't too packed, hopefully not a lot of people wanted to go to Tel Aviv.

"_3 o'clock flight to Tel Aviv now boarding." _The nasally and now familiar voice came again through the speakers.

Tony ran to the metal detectors, flashing his badge before the security guards had a chance to stop him – or take him down.

Ziva stood, ready to board. Slowly she threw her carry-on bag over her shoulder.

"This is it," she whispered to herself. A small part of her still expected Tony to come running around the corner, to stop her from boarding the flight. - Begging her to take him back and saying he never loved Kate, – But the larger part shouted at her that she was stupid for letting her get her hopes up. She thought about taking him back, he had hurt her so badly but deep down she knew that if he didn't love Kate that she would take him back, if he convinced her of that; she could forgive him.

A boarding attendant asking to see her ticket, ready to scan it, interrupted her thoughts.

"Enjoy your flight," she said with a polite tone.

"Thankyou" Ziva mumbled in return. Her thoughts now piling into all the good times she'd had at NCIS. Her best times. The greatest time of her life. And then, in a second, she sighed and let go of them, as though they never existed.

As Ziva disappeared onto the boardwalk, staring at her feet as she moved closer to – what seemed like – her fate.

Tony ran to the gate attracting a lot of staring from confused tourists.

He ran straight to the woman who had just taken care of Ziva.

"I need to get someone of the plane." He said in a rush, all of the running finally catching up with him.

"What?" The woman was confused. She knew this happened in movies and romance novels but she didn't think it happened in real life.

"Ziva!" He yelled down the passageway

"Look, you're going to have to leave." The boarding woman tried to claim his attention to no prevail.

"Ziva!" He yelled again, ignoring the woman "Ziva come back!"

Ziva heard this time. She turned at the sound of her name, already halfway down the passage to get on the plane.

She turned around and began to walk back, unsure of whether he was really there or if she was going mad with the emptiness she felt.

"Ziva!" she heard again, this time clearer.

"I'm sorry, you're going to have to leave. Please, sir."

Tony moved past the woman and ran down the passageway at the same time Ziva ran back to meet him, still unsure of the reality.

"Ziva!" he called again, bumping into an elderly couple.

He recovered and stood back up to see Ziva standing around 10 feet from him. He smiled, relieved. Again, at sight of her, his heart skipped a beat, at one glance, his life felt full again, like the past few days never happened. But they had.

Could she forgive him after all he had put her through? There was only one way to find out. Tony took a step closer and inhaled slowly; He couldn't live without her so there were only two paths – life or death. And she would decide which was which.

_Well, okay. Thankyou all for reading! Chapter 6 coming right up! I'm writing it right now and yeah. So thankyou and if anyone has any suggestions please do not even bother hesitating to tell me!! Thankyou! _

_Xox Mel _


	6. Slipped away

_Sorry for the wait, this chapter is a little out of character and slightly more mushy than Tony –or Ziva – are thought capable of. Here we go:_

**Chapter 6: Slipped away**

"Ziva, I am so sorry." he said, the running now catching up to him. "I never meant to hurt you, ever."

Ziva remained silent, unsure whether or not to trust him. Her heart was in too delicate a place. The one time she had let her walls down, the one time she had ever opened her heart for someone had ended like this, crushed as though beyond repair. How could she trust him to fix that?

"I am so sorry. I have no idea how to make it up to you. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it. I'll do anything." he pleaded, the desperation in his eyes showing through in his expression. Even through his pain he was still breathtakingly spectacular.

There was a long silence, Tony waited patiently for Ziva to speak, clear that his fate was being decided. "You don't have to do anything, Tony." she finally spoke, her voice croaky from the long silence.

His face dropped. Was that good? Did that mean she would forgive him, or did it mean he had so much to make up he shouldn't even bother.

"Please" he pleaded "Please I'll do anything, even if it takes a whole lifetime I will never stop trying to make it up to you. Not for a second."

There was more silence, leaving Ziva to think again. Her heart longed to reach forward and take him back, to hold him in and never let go but her mind had a slightly more pessimistic opinion. What if he did this again? Her brain argued the pros and cons.  
Take him back. Her heart pleaded.  
She looked into his eyes one more time, even in all the anguish and indecision, her heart still skipped a beat looking at him.

"What about Kate?" she asked warily.

"I know who I can't live without." the sincerity in his voice was more real then anything she had ever heard. "I love you." 

"What about Kate?" she repeated the earlier question; the fact that he hadn't answered it did not go unnoticed.

"Would I be here if I loved her?" he asked. The look of Ziva's face indicated that he still hadn't answered the question. "I love you. Not her, I've never felt for anyone the way I feel for you. And I'm sorry it took so long for me to figure it out. I've never felt anything this strong."

Her face relaxed, then tensed into what could only be identified as scepticism

"What about Jeanne?" she challenged.

"I didn't run after her did I? She gave me a choice and I chose the team." he moved closer to her, closing the gap between them. "I chose you."

Ziva smiled and threw herself at him. Their lips meeting with so much force it sent Tony backwards. She wrapped her arms around his neck and his rested on the small of her back, all her pain seemed to heal at his touch. He lifted her up and forced her face closer to his. 

"Excuse me sir." The boarding woman tapped his shoulder, flanked by two security guards. She was clearly not impressed.

Without breaking free of the kiss he pulled out his badge and flashed it to her.

"Oh" 

Ziva broke off to see what was happening. She smiled and returned to Tony so their lips met for another second.  
"So I suppose that only leaves one thing, now." he smiled and got down on one knee. Ziva laughed too, slightly embarrassed as passengers stared, "Ziva David. I love you and I will spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Ziva smiled and nodded, "Yes." she whispered, bending down to touch his lips to hers once more.

XXX

"Well that leaves one more thing to tell everyone else." Tony smiled at Ziva, his arms wrapped around her shoulders in the back of the Taxicab.  
She returned his smile and held her stomach. Still unable to believe what just happened, let alone what was happening. It was all too quick.

"Also, I have to get my job back."

"I'm sure that won't be too hard." Tony smiled "You're with me. I don't work with you. I don't work with no one. And if they don't listen, I'll just take that promotion and I'll hire you on my own team." Tony was happy with his back up plan. He was beginning to trust himself in providing for Ziva.

She looked at him with a confused expression. "Promotion?"

"Oh" he hadn't told her that. "Well it pretty much speaks for itself. Spain. My own team." he smiled at the thought but then shook it away and decided he would rather spend a day with Ziva then get a thousand promotions.

"Well. Let's go get my job back." she said, clearly bothered with the slow speed the cab driver was going.

At that moment three things happened.  
One. The locks on the cab slammed shut.  
Two. Tony stiffened, all of a sudden aware of the hinky feeling in his stomach.  
And Three. The Driver sped up to an insane - yet recognisable - speed. He turned around to face Ziva, she was too wrapped up in her thoughts about Tony that she hadn't even recognised the man. Not until now.

Ziva stiffened at the sight of the man, she would recognise his small, ratty features anywhere. And he was exactly as he looked. a little rat.

"Ziva?" Tony asked, realising her sudden uncertainty and stillness.

"Hello, Ziva. It's been a long time, yes?" the man had a heavy accent.

"What are you doing here, Ishmael?" she asked like ice.

"I'm driving an American Taxi." he smiled, Ziva's anger pleased him.

"Why has my father sent you?" she repeated through clenched teeth.

"Oh. He hasn't sent me, in fact, he fired Me." he smiled bitterly. "I didn't even think you were going to be here but when I saw you I figured this could be fun. I could get my revenge."

She moved her hand to her waist to realise her guns had been confiscated and shipped back to Tel Aviv in another box. Tony moved his hands to his waist as well, realising that Ziva - for possibly the first time in her life - was weapon less. He pulled his gun from his waist and subtly moved it to his side.

"Where do you want to go?" the man piped up, again. "We can do this anywhere you like"

"NCIS" Ziva joked sinisterly.

Ishmael simply laughed. He was going to get his revenge.

Ziva sighed and moved toward Tony to snuggle into his chest, she moved slowly as to call no attention and when she had her arms wrapped around him in an awkward hug - she was never very good at hugs - she pulled the knife that was concealed at his waist.

Tony kissed her. "Rule number 5" he murmured so low that Ishmael had no chance of hearing.

She smiled slightly at his 'joke' and resumed his sitting position with his arm now wrapped even more around Ziva, pulling her toward him tightly.  
Neither of them were too worried about this man, he clearly had no idea that they had weapons on them so he was either very clever or very dumb. In the back of Ziva's mind, however, she knew not to underestimate him, that he could be very clever.

"Alright well we're here." he smiled and moved his arms out in front of him like a model in showroom. "I've always thought there is nothing better the a nice, cliché abandoned building." he smiled again at his choice of location. He knew this place would come in handy sometime. He was incredibly pleased with the way this spur-of-the-moment plan had worked out, everything was moving in his favour.

Ziva's smooth expression moved into a scowl at sight of this location. It reminded her of the place she had made her last move in Mossad, her last kill in cold blood.

Ishmael opened the door for her and Tony, pulling a hand gun out, aiming it toward the pair. Causing the smooth, dead expression to return to Ziva's face.

"Well. Come on, Ziva. What do you think?" he asked excitedly, The gun moving with his hand, though he was completely unaware of it.

Tony moved his hand to his waist, pulling the gun silently from it's holster for the second time that day. Ishmael caught sight of this and in the blink of an eye everything changed. Tony aimed his gun toward Ishmael at the same time that Ishmael grabbed Ziva and held his silver hand gun to sit on Ziva's temple.  
Tony didn't drop his gun, mentally calculating the chances of hitting Ishmael while missing Ziva.

"Drop it." he ordered, slightly amused that Tony would even try. Slowly, he dropped the gun to his side, realising the odds were not good. "Very good." Ishmael's amusement grew into a grin.

While his guard was still down, Ziva pushed out of Ishmael's arms and kicked the gun out of his hands. He turned to grab it when she kicked him down, pulling the knife Tony gave her out and advancing on him. 

Ishmael turned then, reaching to wrestle the knife out of her hands, forcing it to fly across the room. The pair got up an ran for it, Ziva in an early lead before he jumped at her and tackled her to the ground, all the while Tony struggling for a clear shot without hitting his partner.

She pulled free of his grasp and kicked him in his... Man parts. He fell for a second, giving Ziva a chance to recover her knife. As she turned around to fight him off she felt something pierce her stomach, something cold, penetrating through her skin.

"NO!" Tony roared. Firing several shots as Ziva looked down to see the cause of the sudden, intense stabbing pain. She groaned quietly, pulling the blood soaked knife from her abdominal before falling to the ground, fighting the urge to close her eyes.

"NO!" Tony repeated again, now at Ziva's side. "Ziva. No!"  
He removed his shirt and held it to her stomach with one hand, the other hand already dialling 911.

"Tony." she smiled weakly, a hint of panic and loss in her eyes. "I'll be fine" she whispered, trying to sit up against the pressure and pain caused by him.

He smiled back, clearly panicked. "Hello?" he called into his phone, relived. "Ambulance."

"Tony." Ziva repeated, her forehead beginning to bead with sweat.

"Yes?" 

"I love you." she smiled and then slipped into the cool, painless unconsciousness 

XXX

Thankyou all for reading, I'll update soon. :P:P 

_Xox Mel_


	7. The loss

_Believe me when I say – in the next few chapters there is a great twist coming up. I've listened to a few of your suggestions and I like them so thanks everyone for the great suggestions and for the REALLY nice comments thankyou all so much! Anywho. Here is:_

**Chapter seven: The loss.**

"How is she doing?" Gibbs walked into the hospital and stood next to Tony, a million questions in his eyes.

"I honestly don't know." Tony answered, standing and looking into his Boss' confused expression, their eyes at the same level.

"What the hell happened?" he asked, his face moving into the protective shell it moved into when something bad was happening. It was the best way for him - his coping mechanism.

Tony told the story of what had happened and how the pair had come back together, just as he finished Abby came running into the room, not releasing the tight grip she had on McGee's hand, mascara lines running down from her bloodshot eyes, over her cheeks and down her neck.

She broke free of McGee's grasp and hugged Tony tightly and silently, afraid that the answer to her concern would be a negative one.

"How is she?" McGee asked quietly, not bothering to hide the worry on his face. He couldn't cope with this – not another Kate – losing Ziva would be too hard.

Tony sighed, clearly in more than just emotional pain.

"We don't know." Gibbs answered for him.

Tim just nodded. The questions he wanted more than anything to ask could wait. All four sat down quietly, Abby moving back to McGee to for another comfort hug. He had no idea how much he was helping her just by holding her.

Later, Ducky and Jenny turned up together, asking the same questions and getting the same answers.

"I'll go get everyone some coffee." Jen tried to smile comfortingly. Gibbs jumped up to help her. Maybe they could sort some things out alone.

Once they were out of earshot, Gibbs filled Jen out on what Tony had told him.

"So where's agent Todd?" she asked cautiously, hoping she wouldn't hit any nerves with this.

"Kate." He corrected, "She's not an agent."

Jen nodded silently

"She's gone."

They were silent for a few more minutes, collecting the coffees.

"She'll be okay you know, Jethro. Ziva's a survivor" Jen finally said. In the back of her mind, she was a little concerned but she knew Ziva had been through much worse.

"Yeah" Gibbs agreed. His gut seemed to also agree but he couldn't help worry about her. Although 'technically' she wasn't a team member anymore, he still couldn't loose a member of his team, whether she be retired or simply transferred. 'not a member' he thought to himself.

"Jenny—"

"Don't worry, Jethro. I'll file the paperwork to transfer her back as soon as we are out of her."

Gibbs smiled weakly at her, "Thankyou, Jen."

The pair headed back to the silent group. Abby had fallen asleep in McGee's arms and Ducky was quietly comforting Tony.

"What's the time?" he asked as Jenny handed him his drink. He didn't like coffee much but he felt as though he needed it. Strange what grief did to people.

"It's nearly midnight." Ducky answered, glancing at his watch to double check his conclusion.

"What is taking so long?" Tony jumped up and paced back and forth angrily. "They just had to stitch her back up. She's been in there for too long."

"She'll be okay." Gibbs comforted him with a pat on the back; this gesture meant more to Tony than anything Gibbs could have ever said and he knew that.

"What if she's not, Gibbs?" He challenged, his tearless eyes staring right into Gibbs' "What if she's not." he repeated quietly to himself, not as a question, but as a situation. What would he do? How would he cope knowing he cold have saved her? He could have fired at that bastard. He could have killed him before Ziva got hurt or more – he could have prevented any of this crap happening with Kate.

"She'll be fine." Gibbs repeated, more certainty in his voice. He shot a meaningful glance at Ducky.

"Yes, Tony." He piped up "These procedures take a while and they are most likely just checking everything to be on the safe side."

These words calmed Tony mildly; they managed to stop his mind from running wild for a few minutes. He leaned against the wall and slid down it, burying his face in his hands as he hit the ground. Soon he felt two arms form a tight seal around his shoulders. He looked up from his hands into Abby's red, sleep deprived eyes. But still no tears ran from his. If he cried, it would mean he'd given up and he couldn't loose hope, it was the only thing he had left. He had to keep it.

"Thankyou. Abby" he smiled weakly and wrapped his arms around her in return.

Though the team always liked each other, and they always had a special bond, it was only at this moment that they realised all of them were connected in more than just a professional way. They cared for each other and they were there for each other in a way that made them more like family then anything else. During workdays they all had their jobs and they had fun with that, but when it came to the serious things, they bound together.

"When do you think she should be out?" Tony called to Ducky, Abby's arms still locked tightly around him.

"It's hard to tell. Could be and hour, could be four. Depending on how much blood she lost, or if anything vital was hit," Tony tensed and shuddered lightly at the idea of anything vital being hit. "But I doubt anything vital was hit." Ducky quickly added, Tony's reaction not going unnoticed.

Just then, a man in green, surgical scrubs walked down the long hall toward the team. Tony jumped up quickly, almost throwing Abby to the other side of the room.

The surgeon stopped 7 feet from the group and removed his mask.

Before speaking he silently examined each of the faces in front of him, a mixture of anxiety, impatience, trauma and –above all – terror was painted on their faces. Gibbs was the exception to this observation; he stood blankly, coffee in hand, waiting for an answer.

The surgeon inhaled deeply.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly

XXX

_BAHAHAHA!!! Sorry about the cliffhanger. I just really love to do that. I've already written the next chapter I just need to fix it up a bit and it should be up in a few days. _

_Thanks again._

_Xox Mel_


	8. Keep holding on

**Chapter 8: Keep holding on.  
**_Just then, a man in green, surgical scrubs walked down the long hall toward the team. Tony jumped up quickly, almost throwing Abby to the other side of the room._

The surgeon stopped 7 feet from the group and removed his mask.  
Before speaking he silently examined each of the faces in front of him, a mixture of anxiety, impatience, trauma and –above all – terror.

_The surgeon inhaled deeply  
"I'm sorry." He said quietly_

_  
_XXX

"It was too late." The surgeon added, attempting not to live the emotion of these faces too much.

Tony's face fell and his legs began to wobble.

He buried his face in his hands and allowed the long and overdue flow of tears to escape his eyes and slip down the side of his cheek.

Finally, he looked up into the surgeons eyes "When?" he asked in his, deep, pained voice though a feeling of numbness washed over him. He felt nothing, not pain, not sorrow. Just nothing.

"Death was instantaneous for the baby. Miss David is now in a medically induced coma, she should be awake in six to ten hours." he said, happy that he at least got to give some good news. "She'll be fine."

Tony's face picked up. "Ziva's okay?" he asked, his numbness fading away and being replaced with fresh hope - much to his dissatisfaction. This new hope was the only thing keeping his head above water, if the surgeon was screwing with his mind he wouldn't be able to hold it all in.

"Yes, she'll be fine." he said, bewildered on how this man could possibly be _this_ happy after the other bad news he received.

"Why did you say that you were sorry, then?" Ducky asked curtly, clearly annoyed at this man's taste in humour.

All sets of incredibly confused eyes were fixed on the surgeon, waiting for an explanation and willing to put him in some sort of interrogation room if he didn't explain himself soon. Gibbs stayed in the same position, holding his cheap, hospital coffee and waiting for an explanation with a patient façade though on the inside he was just as annoyed and curious as every one else.

"She had a miscarriage," he finally answered, wondering how they didn't get that from the start, they knew that Miss David was pregnant. Didn't they?

All five pairs of eyes turned to Tony, the same shocked expression painted on most of their faces.

It was then that it hit him. That would explain why he had said something about a baby.

"Oh God." he whispered, almost mouthed. "You mean-"

"Ziva was pregnant?" Jenny asked, astonished.

"She didn't tell any of you?" the surgeon was immediately regretting telling them, he had just assumed they had known "I though you already knew." he said, almost apologetic.

There was a long moment of every one gathering their thoughts, Abby and McGee's mouths hung slightly open in the same shocked way, Gibbs' eyes narrowed in deep concentration and Tony just stared into space, mixed emotions running through him, happiness that Ziva was okay but still betrayal that she wouldn't tell him and finally sadness that he had lost something that he never even knew he had.

_  
'Maybe she didn't know'_ he considered but then he shook off that idea, remembering they had had this conversation when they were under cover for the first time:

'Maybe she didn't know.' he had said to her, regarding the pregnancy of Ziva's under cover alias, Sophie Ranier  
'Oh she knew.' Ziva had blown off his idea with certainty.

"How long?" Tony managed to get out. His face looking just as shell shocked as he felt.

"Nearly two months." he answered. Pausing for a moment to let the information sink in. "I'm sorry for your loss. Miss David should be ready for visitors in a few minutes; a doctor or nurse will inform you of when you can go in to see her. She lost a lot of blood but the knife thankfully didn't hit anything vital." He smiled in professional courtesy then disappeared down the long hallway.

Tony rubbed circles around his eyes with the ends of his fingers.  
"She's alright." He smiled, the thought finally sinking in, allowing all the fear and guilt to wash away.

Abby was the first to his side. Smiles and hugs and handshakes went around the room before they sat down and began discussing the news they had just received. Finally a nurse approached in navy blue scrubs.

"Hi." she greeted the group, like the surgeon before, taking in all every single face. "My name is Anna and I'll be taking care of Miss David. She's still unconscious but you can go in and see her now. She won't be awake for another 6 to 10 hours so you can go home and rest until then."  
Without another word, Gibbs, Tony, McGee, Abby, Ducky and Jenny were following the nurse down a long corridor to Ziva's room. When they reached a large wooden door the nurse stopped and turned around.

"Here is her room. I would usually say try and keep it small but it's a large ward." she smiled once more in professional courtesy and left the six agents loitering outside of room number 12, waiting for the first person to enter.

Finally, Tony pushed open the door and walked in to find Ziva propped up in bed, her eyes closed and peaceful. She had different tubes all over her body, connecting to different things, and some connecting to the same things. It was confusing even to look at and Tony knew if Ziva were awake she would hate it.

The whole team stood around, taking in Ziva's comatose state.

McGee pulled up a chair and Abby took position of his lap, clinging to him as she silently dozed off - it had been a tough few days for the whole team - they hadn't had a decent night's sleep in over 75 hours.

Everyone else grabbed chairs and most slowly dozed off to sleep. Eventually Tony was the only one left awake, refusing to so much as blink, afraid he would temp himself to fall under like everyone else. He turned to face his sleeping team and sighed.

"Ziva." he whispered, thinking of the right words to say, though his rational side was convinced she couldn't hear him, deep down he felt like -in a way- she could. He gave up thinking and kissed her lightly on the forehead. "I love you," he whispered, resting his head next to her sleeping form.

Quietly he dozed off, all the while not releasing her hand, even in the deepest of sleep.

XXX

The next day Tony awoke first, stretching up and yawning. The events of the past day came rushing back to him, reminding him of Ziva.

"Oh." he moaned. He'd been hoping it was all just a bad dream.

McGee woke with a start then, almost dropping Abby in the process.

"Morning." he greeted both of them, glancing swiftly at his watch. "Oh. It's zero-eight hundred."

"It's also Sunday." Abby added. "And we're not working a case so we have the day off." she smiled then turned to Tony.

"When should she be awake?" McGee asked, nodding at Ziva.

Tony took a glance at his watch, forgetting McGee had told them the time not long ago. "Well it's been over 7 hours. Give it another 3 before we start panicking."

McGee nodded and pushed Abby off his legs lightly. She had been sleeping on them all night and he had lost all feeling from his thighs down.

"Ow!" he attempted to stand but his legs gave in and Abby caught him.

"Thankyou. Abby." he smiled, sitting back down.

At that moment, Jenny, Ducky and Gibbs woke up, rubbing their eyes and squinting. Their faces slowly realising where they were.

"I need coffee," Gibbs mumbled as he left the room in pursuit of something strong.

"Me too." Jenny added in the same monotone as she stumbled the same way Gibbs went.

The rest of the day flew by without Ziva waking up and Tony began to get agitated. Everyone was called to Norfolk where the body of a Navy lieutenant had been recovered.

"What's wrong?" Tony asked Ziva's doctor as he walked in to check her. "Why isn't she awake?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? They said she'd be awake in 6 to 10 hours." Tony questioned in a very Gibbs-like fashion.

"At the moment it looks like she's being stubborn and she doesn't want to wake up. But we'll take some tests and find out the cause." The doctor nodded in encouragement hoping Tony would relax. This was common in patients and he was positive Ziva would be fine.

XXX

A few hours later the doctor returned to the room holding a clipboard with some papers balanced on top of it.

"Agent DiNozzo." he greeted, looking straight down to the papers in front of him then moving his gaze to measure Tony's worried expression. He recognised this worry, he had seen it a million times and each time it never failed to bring on a sentiment of sorrow in the bottom of his stomach.

"Why isn't she awake yet?" he asked again, rubbing his brow in annoyance.

"Her system is not responding well to the miscarriage. She's in a very fragile condition." He answered calmly.

"What?" Tony asked, his heart rate increasing in worry.

"All I'm saying is just give her more time. Talk to her. Does she have a favourite flower or scent?"

Tony thought for a minute. "Haviar Christian Number Five" He smiled, remembering the bedroom of Jamie Carr.

Back then he was with a girl named Monica and was considering buying the perfume for her until Ziva informed him it cost two thousand dollars an ounce (Season 3, episode 6 - The Voyeur's Web) Ziva had expensive taste.

"Well bring that in. anything familiar can help coma patients wake up. She will wake up when her body comes out of shock. When she's ready" The doctor gave a comforting smile and left the room.

Tony stood for a while, staring at Ziva.

His partner.

His lover.

His friend.

Slowly he walked to her bedside and took a seat, holding her hand. She looked so fragile. Never before had he seen her in such a vulnerable state, like a single touch would break her.

"Ziva. Ziva you have to wake up soon. Everyone is worried about you and we need to talk. I know that loosing the baby." he chocked up on the word, pausing to get his voice back "I know this is hard on you but if you wake up then you have a better chance of getting stronger and better. Please. Be the Ziva I know."

He held her hand firmly, allowing a single tear to fall down his cheek and silently hit Ziva's bed.

XXX

_Okay, please note… I know ABSOLUTELY nothing about medicine! I want to be a film director… I realise that some of the stuff I am talking about makes no sense and I hope that no one reading this is a doctor! Anyway, thankyou for reading. I am so sorry about the crappy medicine stuff… also I realise a doctor wouldn't just say 'I'm Sorry' If someone was alive but I really needed that cliffhanger!! Thanks for understanding!!!_

_Also, I'm sorry about the tragedy of the miscarriage but there is no way a baby could survive that. Again, any suggestions would be great; I promise I won't miscarriage the next ones:D :D_

_Xox Mel  
_


	9. Awakenings

**Chapter 9: Awakenings **

**  
**Another few hours past, Tony talked to Ziva the whole time. At first it was hard to talk to someone who wasn't talking back but eventually Tony got into the rhythm, going on about his favourite movies and finding it hard to stop - especially because no one was trying to shut him up like usual.

"Hello Agent DiNozzo" Nurse Anna walked into the room, immediately at Ziva's bedside, un hooking tubes and re attaching other tubes, it was less confusing but still a jumble to non medical personal.

"What are you doing?" Tony asked, aware of how annoyingly clingy and anxious he was being.

Anna smiled comfortingly and laughed at his expression. He looked as though he was about to pounce. "It's alright, I'm just re-dressing her wounds and replacing some of the tubes here."

Anna changed her bandages swiftly and silently.  
"I'll be back to check up on her again in a few hours. The wound is healing very quickly." She smiled once more and left the room.

Tony sighed and moved back to his chair at Ziva's side. Being a federal agent had given him a certain patients but it was beginning to wear thin.

"Still not awake?" came the deep voice of Ducky from the door. Tony spun around and smiled weakly.

"Yeah. They don't know exactly why."

"Well it's very normal for coma patients to wake up a little later than usual. Especially under the circumstances. I remember once back when I was just a medical student; one of my good friends crashed his shiny new motorbike. He took a while to wake up but when he did--"

"She wasn't in a motorbike accident, Ducky." Tony cut him off, not in the mood to listen.

"No." he paused. Calculating what he should next say. "She'll be alright, Tony."

Tony nodded slowly and sighed. "I know." 

XXX

Ducky left, leaving Tony once again alone with Ziva to talk about films and cars - all the things he would usually talk about but this time he was allowed to keep talking without being shushed.

"How's she going?" the Doctor walked in, holding a stack of papers and files - the hospital was very busy for a Monday night.

Tony stood up quickly, a reflex. "She's still out, if that's what you mean."

The doctor smiled. "Well we've got back the results of some other tests we've done and she's healing. She should be awake today or tomorrow. If she keeps recovering at this rate, it's looking like the end of today."

Tony smiled and turned to Ziva, kissing her on the forehead. "Thankyou."

The doctor turned away and walked out of the room, leaving a smiling Tony to sit and wait.

Slowly the hours ticked over, mostly with Tony watching TV. A few good movies came on and he knew them word for word.

As the clock hit 23.30 Ziva's eyes began to flicker open, slowly but surely she opened her eyes. Though she'd been sleeping for days, she looked tired as ever.

"Tony." she croaked out, her eyelids closing slightly.

Tony jumped at his name - too engulfed in his movie to notice Ziva was awake.  
"Ziva." he called, half shocked, half ecstatic. He leant down and touched his lips to hers, using all his willpower to not crush her with the energy he felt. "How are you feeling?"

"Thirsty." she croaked again, her voice slowly returning to normal.

"I'll go get you a drink." Without another word he dashed out the room and returned seconds later with a cup of water.

"I'm sorry.," he said after Ziva finished her drink and placed it on the bed side table.

"For what?" she asked, honestly not understanding what he could possibly be sorry for.

"I should have killed him before he had a chance to, you know." he allowed this sentence to go unfinished. The two of them had lost more than a few days; they had lost a baby.

"It's not your fault."  
The seconds went by and Tony got onto her bed, laying next to her, his arms wrapped around her in an unbreakable hold.

"You could really use a shower." she finally joked. Smiling as their lips met again.

"Yeah." he joined her smile.

Again there was another silence; the conversation that was inevitable was slowly closing in on them.

"Tony." Ziva began, not making eye contact with him "Is the." the paused "is it gone?"

He sighed and nodded weakly.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." She still looked down to his feet, letting her head hang in shame.

He swallowed, not really wanting to have this conversation. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Slowly, Ziva's eyes moved up until they met the concern and torture of her partner's. She didn't answer.

"oh my god." he began, realising the look on her face "You thought I would leave you?" his voice was now angry but still slightly high pitched from the shock.

Still, she remained silent, too ashamed of herself to answer. She knew it was the wrong thing to not tell him but in the back of her mind she was scared he would leave her that he wouldn't want her or the baby.

"I didn't want to loose you," she whispered, hoping he would just forgive and forget though she knew that was next to impossible.

"You didn't want to loose me?" he repeated still angry "How could you even think that low of me? You know what. Forget it." he collected his jacket and headed for the door, not taking another look behind to see Ziva's face.

"Where are you going?" she called to his back, trying to muster up enough energy to get out of the bed.

"For a walk."XXX

Tony walked for hours, clearing his mind. He couldn't comprehend how she could think that low of him that he would leave her in her condition. That went against every moral fibre in his body. Against everything he stood for.

Ziva sat for hours, regretting her own thoughts, she couldn't help thinking that he would leave her though she knew he would stay she a part of her - deep down - had a feeling he might be scared off. She'd seen it on American television and she'd got scared.

A knock on the door pulled her out of her thought spiral. She looked up to see Jenny standing at the door smiling. "Welcome back, Ziva." she smiled, Tony had clearly not told them of her awakening.

"Jenny." she smiled weakly, not fooling anybody with her happy façade.

"What's wrong? Where's Agent DiNozzo?"

"I ah." her voice cracked as the lump pushing against her throat became too much. A tear slipped down the side of her cheek. "I screwed up."

"What went wrong?" Jenny moved to the seat Tony had set up and sat down.

"You know everything?"

"You were pregnant." It wasn't a question or a statement. Just information

"Okay. That will save us some time. Um Tony asked why I hadn't told him about it and I didn't have an answer." her voice cracked again. This time allowing a huge flow of tears to break through, making it harder for her to hear and understand.

"You thought he would leave you?" Jenny guessed. She had always been a very good people reader. Having Gibbs as a mentor had built that skill.

"I don't think that." Ziva chocked out, the way that Jenny said it made it sound so horrible and untrue.

"But he thinks you do?"

There was a long pause. Judging from the length of it, Jenny had gained her answer.

"What if he doesn't come back?" Ziva asked, getting herself into a panic.

"He'll be back." Jenny said sternly. "He just needs to blow off some steam."

After half an hour Jenny had to leave. Leaving Ziva once again alone with her thought, wonder when or if Tony would come back.

XXX

Tony got up from the bench he had been sitting at for the past hour, suddenly happy again. He felt no anger towards Ziva; he could even see her point of view.

Quickly, he ran back to the hospital, jumping out of the way of wheelchairs and young children, he jumped into the elevator and jumped up and down, waiting for the doors to open again.

Finally, he arrived at Ziva's room. She sat upright and smiled, relieved he had returned, even if it was for round two.

"Tony I'm so---"

"Shh." He cut her off. His finger against her lips. "Since you joined NCIS, our relationship has been nothing but bad timing. Since the very first moment we met it has just all been bad luck. Until now. I am not going to let another thing get in the way of us. So--" He broke off from his sentence and left the room, only to return seconds later followed by a Rabbi.

"Ziva. All you have to do now is say I do."

XXX  
_Okay we're closing in on the end. Thanks for reading this chapter, if anyone has a cute way to finish this, please note I haven't written the final chapter yet… Anyway I realise the last part is rather romantically mushy and out of character but I love romance:D:D  
Thanks,  
Xox Mel  
_


	10. All we are

**Chapter 10, all we are**

Ziva sat up, her mouth hung slightly open with a smile playing on her lips. They were actually doing this.

"I know it's not exactly traditional but--"

"I do." Ziva interrupted, the smile spreading to cover her whole face.

Tony smiled and went to her side, gathering up her hands in his. Finally the bad luck and interruptions were out of the way. They looked into each other's eyes, like they saw beyond them - to each other's souls.

"Okay." he smiled. All the bad luck. All the bad timing was finally over, they were

Going to do this now. "We can begin." he turned to the Rabbi and smiled.

The Rabbi started the 'service' without Tony or Ziva looking at anything besides each other. Since the beginning this was how everyone knew they would end up.  
Since first sight  
First touch.  
First joke.  
Those first words.

Just then there was a noise at the door. Tony and Ziva broke away from each other's gaze and looked up to find Gibbs, Abby and McGee standing at the door. Slightly confused. McGee's mouth hung open a little and Abby squealed in happiness. Gibbs turned his head to the side in the same, 'what are you doing, DiNozzo' way he always did and smiled lightly.

"DiNozzo." he began, interrupting the mood.

"Yeah Boss."

"What are you doing?" he asked, in that same way he always did.

"Ah. Well Ah me and Ziva are getting married…?" he said, as though he was questioning the plausibility of his own statement.

"Well, yeah. I can see that. I was wondering why we weren't invited?" Gibbs slapped Tony on the back of the head and moved back a few paces to join Abby and McGee watching.

"Sorry. Boss." He said and waved his hand, indicating the service should continue.  
The service finished quickly, no vows, and no rings - they were back at Tony's apartment. - Just the two declaring their love by signing the papers.

The Rabbi left as soon as the service finished, leaving the newly married pair to face the team.

"Congratulations." Abby cried, smiling and hugging everyone. There was a time when she hated Ziva but as time went on she realised that even though she may not be preferable to her she was still family. Eventually she began to get along with her and like her.

"Thanks, Abs." Tony gasped, receiving the bear hug he knew and loved.

"Thankyou. Abby." Ziva smiled, her hug was lighter as she had been in surgery.

"So. You two got married and didn't tell me?" Gibbs asked. The same words he had said to Ziva once as a joke. Even then he knew they would end up together.

"Sorry, Boss." Tony apologised again, somehow forgetting the 'no apologies' rule.

"Congratulations." Gibbs extended a hand and Tony accepted, this gesture meaning more to him then anything else he could offer.

More hugs and smiles went around the room for a few more minutes, taking a while for the atmosphere to die down.

"So when are you out?" Abby finally asked once everything was settled.

"She should be out by Thursday." Everyone turned around to the door to find Kate standing at the door.

"What are you doing here, Kate?" Tony asked, his voice a monotone, careful not to care too much.

"I talked to Ducky. I'm only here to apologise to everyone," she said, turning to Ziva first. "Ziva. I'm sorry for all this, I don't know what else to say. Just, I'm sorry" Ziva nodded in acceptance and Kate turned to McGee and Tony standing together. "I'm sorry for keeping this from you two."

Finally, she turned to Gibbs.

Her former Boss.

Her former friend.

"Gibbs." she choked up "I should have trusted you. To help me."

Gibbs nodded once, his expression not changing once. "Goodbye Kate." 

XXX

**5 years later:**

**  
**Tony sat at his desk in the bullpen, smiling across at his beautiful wife. Though they were married five years, her beauty never failed to knock the breath out of him. Her face just as young and breathtaking as it was years earlier.

"The answer is no, Tony. Not tonight." Ziva said without even having to look up.

Tony opened his mouth in mock-horror and transformed to a smile once Ziva's gaze met his. "Can't a guy just admire his beautiful wife?" he asked, totally innocent.

She thought about that for a moment. "Yes, A guy can. You, Tony?"

"Yes. I am capable of admiring someone's beauty without mentally undressing said person." He rebutted. Again they were going to get into another joking argument. In the five years of marriage rarely did they ever have a serious fight. The job was so physically and emotionally demanding that after they got their humorous banter out of the way, there was no need for a serious fight.

Ziva looked up through her long lashes, Holding Tony's gaze. "So you weren't mentally undressing me?" she asked in an angry tone.

"Well. Yeah, I was but—"

"Maybe tonight after all, then." She smiled at the sight of his face lighting up. After a few minutes of silence, the pair we're interrupted by deep breathing coming from McGee's desk. The two smiled at each other and turned to face him.

"Nervous, Probie?" Tony asked, knowing exactly what he was worried about. After all, he had had to do it the last time. He knew all about it. The sweaty palms the stumbling speech. Everything.

"And you weren't?" McGee half yelled, half questioned, after he calmed his breathing enough to put two words together.

"Well. Yeah, Of course I was. But I mean. Ziva's really flighty." he answered, shooting a joking smile at his wife.

"Yes," Ziva answered, her eyes narrowing slightly "And Tony was with a new girl every weeknight." she shot him back the same smile he given her; so glad they still joked together. Even though he was hard to take seriously, that was the thing that made her fall for him in the first place. Their sexual tension and she only realised how much she felt it once it was gone.

"Oh. Come on. That's not true!" he called, trying to protect his reputation, which was already a lost cause. He's doubted an uncountable amount of girls but it was still fun to try and defend himself.

"Of course it's not" she agreed, turning from McGee to Tony. "Spanky."

Tony's eyes widened slightly. "Who told you about that? It was a one-off thing."

"Come here, McGee," Ziva ordered ignoring the babbling coming from the desk parallel.

He stood up and walked over to her desk at the same time as Tony ran to over-take him, sitting in front of Ziva and smiling like a child that knows he's being annoying.

"You'll be fine." she comforted him, rubbing his shoulder and pushing Tony off her desk in the same movement. "Can I see the ring?"

McGee exhaled deeply through his mouth and pulled out a black and red case from his breast pocket. "Do you think she'll like it?" he asked, opening the case to reveal a delicate, skull and crossbones ring. The ring was so intricate, with fine black silver intertwining each ruby, like a spider weaves its web.

"I think it's very 'Abby,'" Tony laughed at Ziva's expression.

"Yes. She'll love it," she added.

"But will she say yes?" he asked. The panic coming back into his voice.

"McGee. If she doesn't marry you, I promise I will." Ziva smiled shooting a teasing look at Tony before pulling winking and pouting her lips flirtatiously it was so much fun to tease Tony.

"What have I told you about multiple inter-office marriages, David?" Gibbs asked, marching into the bullpen. "Grab your gear, we've got a dead marine at Quantico." he ordered as usual, without waiting for a response to his first question.

"Actually, Gibbs. I have a doctors appointment in 15 minutes" Said Ziva, already leaning across her office block to get her coat.

"All right. Meet us there as soon as you're done." Gibbs ordered, attaching his gun to his back holster.

" And get Ducky on your way out. Come on, Spanky, you're with me." He called to Tony and he marched past him, his gear already prepared.

"On your six, Boss." Tony replied and turned to Ziva, pulling her up off her chair.

"Good luck." he smiled, kissing her lightly on the lips before bending down to kiss her 5 month pregnant stomach then stretching up to touch his lips to her's once more before she left.

"I love you." he smiled, chasing after his boss before the elevator doors closed. "Both of you."

XXX

Well, that's it. Thankyou all so much for all the kind comments and ideas and support. Without everyone reading this there is no way I could keep writing it – However Cliché that may sound it's still true.

Sorry for all the interruptions throughout the story. Thankyou all so much. I hope you liked it!

Until next time.

Xox ncisgirl101 


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